Why You Take Everything Personally (And How To Stop Believing It’s Always About You)

Why do we take everything so personally? Do you overthink text messages, assume someone's upset with you when they're just having a bad day, or interpret feedback as proof you're not good enough? If you constantly read into other people's behaviour and assume the worst, this episode is a must-listen. This week, I share how I've been working on taking things less personally, managing rejection sensitivity, and overcoming the social hypervigilance that can cause us to read into every single interaction. I explore the psychology behind why we’re so quick to perceive rejection and criticism, even when it has literally nothing to do with us . We cover practical strategies and reframes to stop taking things personally, including how to separate facts from the stories you're telling yourself, assuming positive intent, and getting curious about the other, instead of immediately turning inward and overanalyzing. The goal definitely isn't to stop being a sensitive person or pretend you don't have feelings (I really do believe my sensitivity is a superpower)… it's to stop interpreting every unanswered text, cancelled plan, or bad mood as evidence that you aren’t loved, accepted, or included. Ultimately, not everything is about you—and that’s a good thing. Remembering that it’s usually not personal can free up SO MUCH mental energy and allow you to be more present in your life. You can be a sensitive person who cares deeply about your relationships without taking responsibility for every little thing people do. Tune in to learn about: Why some people are more sensitive to perceived rejection, criticism, and exclusion Rejection sensitivity and social hypervigilance: why we monitor other people's moods and behaviour The impact on taking things personally in every pillar of life The spotlight effect and why we overestimate how much other people notice us How to separate what actually happened from the stories and assumptions you're creating Why we fall into mind-reading, overthinking, and rumination when we feel rejected or insecure The power of assuming positive intent and considering other person’s circumstances Why getting curious, asking questions, and communicating directly changes everything How to manage emotional reactivity without suppressing your feelings Practical questions to help challenge anxious assumptions For advertising and sponsorship inquiries, please contact Frequency Podcast Network. Subscribe to my Substack: teachmehowtoadult.substack.com Follow us on the ‘gram: @teachmehowtoadultmedia @gillian.berner Follow on TikTok: @teachmehowtoadult Subscribe on YouTube Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.