Ep. 36 How To Get Over A Toxic Interaction (When Talking It Out Isn't Enough)

If you've been searching for how to get over a toxic interaction that keeps replaying in your head no matter how many times you've talked it out, this episode is for you. I see this constantly with clients — they've processed something out loud with a trusted friend, sometimes more than once, and it should feel done. And yet weeks later, it's still there, still living in the body. In this episode, I break down why getting over a toxic interaction takes more than talking about it. Your nervous system doesn't decide something is finished based on whether you've narrated it — it decides based on whether the activation in your body got to complete. This is somatic healing at its core: I bring in Peter Levine's work on nervous system regulation to explain the mechanism — animals discharge survival energy physically after a threat and move on fully, while humans are taught to stay calm and hold it together, which leaves that energy stuck in the body instead of released. I also walk through the four things a toxic interaction usually touches — abandonment, not being enough, being unseen, and safety through appeasement — and how to spot the real clue: when an emotional trigger feels bigger than the moment that caused it. That gap is where the real work is. Knowing how to get over a toxic interaction isn't about talking yourself out of ever getting triggered again. I share a personal story about a friendship that changed permanently after one interaction I didn't handle well, and how self-compassion — not resolution — is what actually helps. If a toxic interaction is on repeat in your head right now, I have a free resource: " A Toxic Interaction in 15 Minutes " is in the shop, built specifically to interrupt the spinning and bring your nervous system back to neutral. If something deeper is still there after that — anger, shame, loneliness, betrayal — the Trigger Toolkit is the next step. And if you're ready to go deeper than any single interaction — into what's actually running underneath all of them — that's the work we do together in the Intuitive Circle. Doors are open now at lesleyturner.ca/theintuitivecircle. Book a Free 15-min Identity Shift Call Subscribe to the pod: Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/730IxK6Le9bwgAwKQBbrfM?si=a649923b6d4f4a4b Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/her-identity-shift-nervous-system-regulation-somatic/id1896858957