Ep. 47 A Toxic Ex-Husband | How To Trust Yourself When He Makes You The Villain (Part 2)

If you’re dealing with a toxic ex-husband who’s rewriting the story of your marriage, turning mutual friends against you, or sending long messages designed to make you doubt yourself, this episode is for you. Your phone lights up, it’s him again, and in his version, you’re the one who ruined everything. I’ve sat with a lot of midlife women going through separation, and some of the most powerful sessions I’ve ever held have been about exactly this: the moment the man you married starts to feel like a complete stranger, and you start wondering if maybe he’s right about you. This is Part 2 of my divorce conversation, and it’s about how you come back to trusting yourself, your memory, your read on things, and your gut, even when a toxic ex-husband is working hard to convince everyone that you’ve got it all wrong. In this episode, I cover: What post-separation abuse looks like: rewriting history, a smear campaign, financial abuse in divorce, and messages written to provoke you Why your nervous system keeps reaching for the man it bonded to, and why you keep defending him even when your friends can see it clearly What Jen Hamilton ’s public divorce shows us about finding out the person you married was living a different life How to love who he was and still see clearly who he is now Why a toxic ex-husband still gets a reaction out of your body, and how cord cutting, the somatic healing side of this work, calls your energy back A simple nervous system regulation practice for the next time his name pops up on your phone Why I tell my clients to get a divorce coach for the legal and money side, so you’re not figuring it out alone at midnight You don’t need to diagnose him or label his personality. You only need to see what’s happening and trust what you see. The love was real, and you get to keep your memories. They just don’t get to make your decisions anymore. For so many midlife women, this is the identity shift underneath divorce: becoming the woman who reads his message once, puts her phone down, and trusts herself through all of it. If you’re not safe right now: in Ontario, call the Assaulted Women’s Helpline at 1-866-863-0511 (#SAFE from a mobile), or call 911 if you’re in immediate danger. Book your free 15-minute Identity Shift Call: lesleyturner.ca . We’ll get clear on what’s changing for you and what you need now, and you’ll leave knowing your next step. Free until November 30. Related episodes: Episode 45: I Want a Divorce | An Identity Shift for Midlife Women (Part 1) The Good Girl Can’t Survive Past 40, Four Signs the Emotional Patterns Are Healing Resources: Two Cords Guided Ritual - Can't reconcile the person you married with the ex who shows up now? Two Cords is a 20-minute guided cord-cutting rituatl to help you call back the energy you've poured into both versions of them, see them as one whole person, and release the waiting. Your good memories stay. It comes with a fillable companion guide. $37. Find me on Instagram @thelesleyturner Book a Free 15-min Identity Shift Call Subscribe to the pod: Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/730IxK6Le9bwgAwKQBbrfM?si=a649923b6d4f4a4b Apple Podcasts -<a href='https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/her-identity-shift-nervous-system-regulat